[51] you will add many months, perhaps years to my life by seeing
my lovely Sovereign and filling her head with :::
recollections of our happy hours at Fonthill. Tomorrow I set forwards
again and shall proceed without stopping till we reach the wild rocks
of the Tirol I shall I dare say enjoy many a deep reverie amongst
their solitudes in which you will seem to descend the Forests of Pine
which cover the Mountains. Adieu my Love, how does your picture
thrive. give me an Account of its progress. You will
of course let me know if you see that noodle xx and what she says
in all the confidence of silliness. If you hear any thing of
me that is at all Characteristic be sure let it be mentioned.
Monday
Night March 4th 1782
The Winds are murmuring around me and I am relapsed into one of my
melancholy moods. - Why do you live away from me intirely?
Are we never again to talk over [52] our last journey to Fonthill
the soft light that tinted the meads and the River at Staines
and the conversation you had with Wm in the Eve: Shall I forget
our arrival the dark night in the enchanted Halls! no never.
O God what consolation have I left in this existence; but the
recollection of those delightful Hours! If you have any inclination
to trace back the incidents of last December be with me to
morrow Morning
Mr Cozens
Augsburg June 2d 1782
I keep wandering on like a restless Spirit and only wish some powerful
Sorcerer would lay me in the red Sea. I cannot forget my poor little
Wm I cannot banish from my thoughts those happy hours we past
last Xmas at Fonthill That Night in particular haunts my imagination
when we arrived from Salisbury and seemed transported to a warm illuminated
palace raised by Spells in some lonely Wilderness. Dont you
remember the soft tints that coloured the Thames the preceding evening?
Alas I cannot chase one circumstance however trifling [53]
from my memory. Thank Heaven you were with me your image is
now connected with the happiest recollections which rise in my mind.
Here am I once more in my old apartment calling up the long
series of events which have taken place since last I saw it.
You may guess what figure appears predominant. I am
very weak and tired with my Journey How shall I support the
heats of Italy your Son is well and grows every day in my esteem.
Burton falls into delightful reveries upon the Harpsichord,
but often touches certain chords which bring all Fonthill before my
eyes and make me run wild about the Chamber. The Weather is gloomy
and every Mountain still crowned with snow I long to hear from
you and to enjoy sunshine My Langour is such that I can write
no more My dear Friend adieu.
[54]
From my Cell July 2d 1781
My eyes are a little better; but would have been much more so, had
they but seen you last Wednesday. The pure air of the range
has greatly relieved my cold and of consequence my spirits, I suffer
myself to be lulled by the murmurs of Pan in his favorite grove and
when Evening draws on listen to the language of the Rooks with attention
all this is amendment, for in the great City where most was
required I paid no attention to any thing Come here and you
shall not be neglected tho I am often to be surprized in reveries
which bear off my poor weak Soul to Wm
Mrs
B:d
Paris Monday Oct: 28 1782
Now I approach. The Mountains, the Lakes, the plains recede, the Sea
Coast begins to appear and afar off I seem already to discover the
white cliffs of our Island
My dear Louisa with what joy shall I see you again with what
Transport shall I plunge into my Indian dreams At Fonthill
we shall be peaceful and happy [55] unless I am cruelly mistaken
My Cousins are to be with me I receive the most aff: Letters
from my Wm Tho pale and weak in my bosom is perfectly
tranquil I feel delightfully calm My sensations I sd imagine
like those of a person who after struggling with the waves stretches
out his limbs on a bank of green swerd and lulled by the murmurs of
leaves sinks into repose. Take great care of the inclosed and if you
love me convey it safe .
Margate
April 14th 1781
I am just landed shaking every nerve and casting eager looks towards
XX The Eve: is clear and cool the Sun set red and troubled
I have been walking on a green open field which crowns a cliff and
deploring my strange fate that fatal power of distracting others and
of imbibing myself too soft too fond affections. What
Adventures have I to relate, my dear Friend, They will make
you tremble. Come to me in the course of [56] to morrow Eve:
that I may have the comfort of telling you again and again how sincerely
I am your aff:
William Beckford
After
passing six tedious days at Calais and hearing contrary winds howl
dismally the sky cleared and we came over. I landed by Moon
light under the Cliffs and walked to and fro a few minutes in spite
of the Cold. Let me see you Monday Eve: my dear Friend
adieu for a few hours. you are the only Being to whom I write.
Dover Saturday Eve Nov 9 1782
Saturday
May 1780
I have been sailing with the Argo since I saw you last. We soon left
the Helespont behind and favorable winds [57] wafted us too swiftly
by the green coast of Propontis. Hercules was in raptures at
the sight of the lofty Mountain, where his Fates whispered he was
to be enshrined a God amongst Gods. We had a great deal of conversation
which I shall impart to you this Evening. I long to relate the story
of Hylas who you know accompanied us in the Expedition. I injoin
you by all our Divinities of Greece and the Indies not to allow any
Engagement whatsoever to hinder your seeing me at half past six.
I write
to you from the confines of the Forest of Ardenn once the delight
of Chivalry. At this moment I survey its vast solitudes which
the twilight renders still more aweful and interesting The
Town swarms with Idlers and gay Vagabonds I left them dancing
and fiddling to stray by myself amongst the Rocks and view the distant
Woods from their promontories Would to God the the memorable
Fountains of Merlin were still attainable I might then be happy
with the hopes of forgetting a passion [58] which preys upon my soul.
I cannot break my chains I struggle and the more attempts I
make to shake them off the firmer they adher to me This wayward
Love of mine makes me insensible to every thing I move feverishly
from place to place but it is in vain it pursues me
pursues me with such swiftness! seizes upon me and marks me for its
own O delicious Hours that are gone for ever your recollection
is my sole comfort I live alone by your remembrance.
Spa July 7 1780
Naples
Novr 7 1780
Your charming lines of the 29th Sepr found me viewing our classic
Bay from Sir W.ms terrace and gazing with all my eyes earthly and
spiritual upon the Island of Caprea Why are you not at my side
to share my sensations and fix the glorious scenery of the Clouds
with your pencil. Next Summer unless my hopes are frustrated
will see us I hope reposing under our own Cypresses at Fonthill and
talking of Hesperia. I attempt neither description nor any
thing else in those short Letters [59] which are only meant to tell
you I am well and ask if you are so. Upon my return I shall lay whole
Volumes before you I saw your friend H at Rome who seems to
have a share of Taste but wants our fiery enthusiasm without which
life is dull and stagnant Does your Son go on with my drawings? I
hope he does he cannot make too many Having seen Italy
I value them more than ever if that be possible. My affect:
Compliments wait upon him Circe desires to be included in this
remembrance since no Artist ever did ampler justice to her promontory.
The Sirens have been propitious and granted me I am bold and
vain enough to say some few of their persuasive accents
Indeed I flatter myself I have gained considerably how could I do
otherways hearing Lady Hamilton every day whose taste and feeling
exceed the warmest ideas I pass my whole time with her
she perfectly comprehends me an is more in our Style than any Woman
with whom I am acquainted My dear little Friend writes
me the most affec: Letters I could desire Judge therefore whether
I do not think Naples the Garden of Irem and see blue skies and [60]
and brighter Sunshine than exist perhaps in reality Adieu
Paris
March 10th 1781
I have no other consolation but Musick no other method of expressing
my feelings my Pen drops from my enervate hand and obliges
me to pauze every three Lines I write You cannot imagine to
what a feeble state of existence my frantic and impatient passions
have reduced me Would to God I could snatch up you know who,
in my arms and flying to the utmost extremity of the Earth reach that
secure retirement of the good old Punese Monarch supplied by golden
fountains eternally flowing with milk. I loath this World and would
at all events find out some other were it not for the hopes of enjoying
your Society and casting one more look on my dear little W:m. His
image haunts me, his voice seems to vibrate in my ears when I play
some little airs on the Pianoforte which I composed during
my happy hours. Adieu I have hardly strength to tell you
that scarce a thought enters my
[CONTINUED]